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| ladies and gentlemen and pantsers. the announcement you all haven't been waiting for...
I HAVE A NEW BLOG.
that's right, after a few months of deliberation, i've decided to move my ridiculous musings elsewhere, to a place where EVERYONE has the right to comment, where personal worth is not determined by eProps, where i am free to have my v. own dorkalicious URL.
it's a little weird, to say good-bye to xanga, to no longer be reminded of just How Many Days Have Passed Since I've Been a Member So Why Don't I Go Premium? but fear not, i've packed up all of my belongings here (minus a few comments that got lost in the van) and moved them over to my new site. so if you ever get nostalgic for one of my rants about cadbury eggs or mellowcreme pumpkins, you can still re-visit them. and of course i'll still be signing in to read my subscriptions and leave extremely thoughtful and clever remarks.
and if anyone wants my eProps, you can have them, cos i've learned that i can't spend them outside of xangaland (hmph).
i must give big, huge, GIGANTIC thanks to matt, without whom none of this (literally) would be possible. matt, you are a genius, and you are so awesome that i didn't even need to write yr name down on a tiny piece of paper in order to remember you while giving (writing) this speech.
so without further ado...
ready the balloon drop!
pop open the champers!
throw some confetti!
actually yell the word, "HURRAH!"
and let me introduce you to...
www.poshdeluxe.com
oh i hope you like it.
and a fond farewell to my little neck of xanga. thanks for making my first blog experience so fun and easy peasy!
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| fa fa fa fa fried food
wurstfest: batter and deep fry my heart
last weekend, meredith, matt, mandy, henri and i drove up to new braunfels to celebrate sausage, which really means lots of eating and drinking and socializing, i.e. pantsing.
for posh, festivals are simply an excuse to eat as much cray fried food as possible, ESPECIALLY if it is on a stick. therefore, this entry will be highlighted by the various delicacies i enjoyed, a decision that i'm sure shocks all of you out there on the nets.
upon arrival, we immediately purchased a traditional german dinner plate, complete with sausage and sauerkraut. below you will see meredith modeling her food for you:
thank you, meredith.
besides eating and drinking, wursfest also involves lots and lots of hats, some of which are traditional, and others seem to have evolved from a sort of marriage between frat guys and puffy things. matt and mandy both chose the more dignified route:
which of course we then had to go and undignify.
josh showed up just in time to join in our salute to german headgear:
i swear he practices in front of a mirror.
people also think it's fun to dress up their kids like little german madame alexander dolls, which is actually ok with me cos HELLO ADORABLE.
although i just now noticed that dude's unicorn shirt on the top right. i don't really think we should be exposing kids to the idea of unicorn intercourse, you know? they are MAGICAL, PURE CREATURES. seriously people.
and i was already creeped out enough that this kid knows the longhorn sign at such a young age. sweet fancy moses.
[ed. note: josh pointed out that i forgot to mention the two funnel cakes we ate. i believe they were consumed around this point, although i have no pictoral evidence]
due to the laws of wursfest, things had to get more ridiculous with the passing of each hour. one of the guys found a cracked pair of kid sunglasses in the parking lot, which launched a whole other series of portraits, entitled: These Make My Head Look Big.
henri, as a cray cray sean lennon
the ever luminous josh
matt, looking like a cartoon character that i can't quite name at this moment...
if you know which character i'm talking about, PLEASE LET ME KNOW.
another major selling point of wurstfest is the fact that they have CARNIVAL RIDES. i get really excited whenever i get the chance to go to a fair, cos i was deprived as a child. my dad, as the original safety pants (need i remind you of our flip-flops on airplanes discussion) thought that all carnival rides were super super dangerous and therefore rarely allowed me to hop on the Tornado or the Hurricane or the Wheel of Death or whatever. then again, the rides are probably FULL of germs and maybe even kid pee, so i can see his point.
anyway
WE RODE THE FERRIS WHEEL!!!!!!
riding the ferris wheel worked up our appetities, so we shared two plates of fried potato spirals and... an AWESOME BLOSSOM!
it was definitely some kind of awesome.
then we headed down to the river for some quiet reflection on the beauty of life and the sausage.
this photo may appear as the cover for "BNARDT: greatest hits from wurstfest."
you may ask, but BNARDT, where was the dancing? and BNARDT will reply:
here!!! underneath the glorious streamers and twinkly lights!!!!!
BNARDT performed its well-known and extremely original interpretation of the "chicken dance," and even invited several members of the "audience" to join the circle.
dancing, of course, made me hungry, so i ate some crab and cheese balls on a stick (at least, i think that's what they were), which was sadly my only stick food of the day. but still, they were pretty good.
yeah that's my Official Festival Food Face.
oh wait! i was wrong! i had a banana dipped in chocolate on a stick!! dang i wish i had a picture of that instead of the stupid crab balls.
i *also* failed to take a picture of my last meal at wurstfest, a FREAKING FRIED OREO. oh yes i went there and i even licked my fingers. it was some tasty business in that really disgusting sort of way, like french fries covered in chili and cheese.
gah writing this post has made me HUNGRY LIKE A HIPPO. oh lunchy lunch why are you so far from me...
unfortunately, wurtfest also has a dark side, wherein the spirits of the fried food you ate and beer you drank may come back to haunt yr tummy with their mean nasty ghost tricks.
thus is the case with meredith and the return of her alter-ego, The Curb.
fortunately we all pepped up back at our bed & breakfast for an extremely intense game of pop culture celebrity pursuit.
and i just realized that meredith's expression is exactly the same in both of these photos, which is sort of eerie, like The Curb is looking out at me through her eyes. eeeeeee heebie jeebies!
the next day, we walked into the dining room in our jimjams and with rock star bed heads, which immediately caught the attention of the more elderly and actually dressed patrons of the B&B. of course that made us feel cool, in that "yeah we're young! suck it!" sense. or maybe that was just me.
here we see meredith and mandy, on the porch, waxing nostaligic about wurstfest 06.
guys i really need a porch.
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| lady sovereign & missy elliot will blast yr brains out harder than a nuclear holocaust.
pants of the end times
even though my state is still super duper red, yesterday turned out pretty ok, yeah? i mean, besides our whole governor situation. seriously, this whole "no term limits" thing is pretty much one of the worst ideas ever, right above my recurring issue with Eating Too Much Fried Cheese.
so last night COULD have been the end of the world... but not really, cos that actually happened on saturday night when we threw an "apocalypse WOW!" party at henri's house. everyone's always talking about avian flu and nuclear bombs and global warming blah blah blah but helloooooo the apocalypse is what you MAKE of it, people. and WE made it freaking awesome.
here's yr hostess, as tank girl (from the comic, NOT the annoying lori petty kind):
yes, i felt extremely kickass in my costume. and yes, i took a ton of pictures cos honestly i don't think i will ever look or feel this hardcore again. and yes i put one... ok, two... on myspace.
notice my gun. yes, i will kill you.
meet the host, battle ready jesus:
oh c'mon, you KNOW he ain't gonna be meek.
since the end of the world is a common theme on the Best Show of All Time (i'm not gonna translate that for you cos you should know), mandy dressed as one of the Gentleman (eeeeee) and meredith came as evil willow.
that is some serious heebie jeebies, ya'll.
ray dressed up like some dude from "28 days later," but i haven't seen it cos I DO NOT WATCH SCARY MOVIES. his cousin, ben, came as a christian soldier. you can see the hiiiiilarious back of his t-shirt (which he bought at fiesta, obvs) on my flickr.
tim was exposed to radiation, so his unborn twin grew out of his body (or something like that).
the best part about tim's costume was the looks he got when asking store clerks where he could find baby parts.
josh arrived dressed as... well... you know.
i had no idea that marvin zindler's wig was so versatile.
tary and carter won the award for Making The Grossest Thing Ever Into Something Adorable: they were cockroaches!
and perhaps the most HORRIFYING costume of all:
juliet, as ann coulter. SWEET FANCY MOSES SAVE ME.
per usual, the party got a little cray. i blame battle ready jesus for starting it.
the fog machine ended up filling the whole house with smoke, which set off all of detectors. you know you've got a good party when alarms are going off and you can't see any of the 15 people around you on the dance floor.
occassionally, the fog cleared...
see sometimes it's better not to be able to see.
of course when the crayness set in, ray took my goggles, as expected.
anyone who was at my 2003 birthday bowling car wash party will experience some extreme deja vu looking at the above picture.
by the end of the night, the apocalypse HAD gotten a little scary.
seriously. WHOAH. josh. gah.
but all in all, it was a glorious night, cos my poccies know how to party like it's the end times.
cheers to the end of one (political) world and (hopefully) the beginning of a whole new one. Y2K!!!!
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| another positive change: i've got sound, yo! here's a remix to shake yr boo-tay in celebration.
OMG OMG OMG
britney spears FILED FOR DIVORCE TODAY.
SWEET CRACKER SANDWICH IT'S FINALLY HAPPENING.
now, let's see if these winds of precious, precious change will affect the elections today. i mean, if we're kicking k-fed out of the house, we should be able to kick some republicans out, too.
welcome back, britters.
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| yep. still no music. hemeh.
boston pants party
wherein our intrepid posh explores cemeteries, learns about pirates and tackles a big breakfast.
last weekend, henri and i went up to boston so he could do a few more shows at the coolidge. well, that was the excuse. the REAL reasons we went up to boston were:
1) to hang out with george (works at the coolidge) & his lovely wife, jenny
2) to eat dessert at finale
3) to buy things at trader joe's
4) to see this:
!!!!!!!!!! autumn leaves!!!!
thankfully, it was not too terribly cold, but i still wore long underwear every day. cos i'm a pansy.
by the way this is a long post, but it's mostly pictoral, so i think you can make it through. kinda like in elementary school, when you impressed everyone by reading a big thick "adult" book, but they didn't know it had pictures in it. oh maybe you didn't do that.
on friday night, henri's friends from NYC drove down to attend the boy band sing-along and get ridiculous in our hotel room afterwards. and by ridiculous, i mean this:
note how henri embodies both of his shows that weekend, with his drawn-on beard (boy band) and his luscious locks (hedwig). alex is wearing the michael jackson wig, which really had nothing to do with this weekend.
the next day, it rained a lot. but i didn't care, cos i brought my RAIN BOOTS!
rainboots brought to you by meredith a. borders
yeah, that's right, puddles. be v. afraid, cos i will STOMP ON YOU.
for brunch, george took us all to the MOST AWESOME DINER, appropriately named the deluxe diner (i know, right?!!!). check out this charm:
and as if they needed another reason to re-name it the POSH deluxe diner... THEY SELL CUPCAKES!!!!!!
AND THEY LOOK LIKE SEA URCHINS!!!!!
honestly, i was hypnotized for several minutes as i stared through the glass window. it was kinda like an out of body experience.
the diner is famous (well, famous to george) for their breakfast platter named "the colossal hungry man" (seriously, that's what it's called). so of COURSE we all had to get it. the fact that our plates barely all fit on the table was of little concern. when i saw my SWEET POTATO PANCAKES and my FRESH-BAKED PEPPERJACK CHEESE AND SESAME TOAST, i nearly cried.
here's my hungry man, before:
and after:
i know, it totally kicked my ass. i guess i am not so colossal after all.
pantsing in the cemetery
we said good bye to the NYC crew and decided to walk off our mega-carbs with a visit to mt. auburn cemetery, the first garden cemetary in the country. you guys, this place is AMAZING. it's like the graveyard in sunnydale, but IT'S REAL. i think edward gorey dreamt of mt. auburn whenever he took a nap between drawings. it's gorgeous and vast and fascinating... and time stops here. it really does.
each sign we passed made me feel like we were marching deeper and deeper back through time.
we meandered through hills dotted with graves and valleys of crypts; there was even a forest, convincing me that we had left boston forever.
i took a lot of photos of the tombstones, even though i felt like that kid in high school who thinks he's cool cos he takes pictures of angel statues in cemeteries and then submits them to the literary magazine. the artistry was captivating, a glimpse of lives long passed from the bones beneath our feet.
the creepiest tombstone we found was a cradle, the morbidly sweet resting place for a little one.
of course, we weren't exactly somber the whole time.
that's george and his grave (we took pictures of all of us behind our graves, which you can see on flickr).
and here's henri and george, proclaiming their buffyliciousness to... all of the dead people.
yes, they were singing "rest in peace."
i could go on and on about mt. auburn, but i don't want the rest of the weekend stories to feel bad.
that night, george and jenny invited us to their halloween party, which was faboo. here are the deliciously dead hosts:
george didn't intend on dressing as jack white, but yeah, it happened.
here's me, having fun with the black light:
do i like like a 16 year old on myspace or what? OMg tHe ANgsT!!
at midnight, we headed over to the coolidge for the hedwig show and met up with michael. he was dressed as a dude from jersey.
i mean, perfect.
salem, yo.
sunday we headed to salem with george and jenny to get some halloween action. here's a picture from the window display of the witch dungeon:
aww, they're kinda cute for dead witches!
of course, we took the obligatory tourist pictures cos, hello, that's what i do.
ha ha ha torture is so FUN and GOOFY!! la la la.
i guess salem wants people to know that not all witches are bad, cos there's a bewitched statue in the center of town (brought to you by tv land, which is weird in and of itself).
notice the creepy, creepy smile on the statue. i'm trying to ignore it in the picture. yay!
around halloween, salem is basically like renfest, except with slightly fewer knights and more kids in cute costumes.
i thought these kids were adorable until ryan left a horrified comment on my flickr re: why are carebears eating children?
but salem isn't just about witches. oooooh no. it's also about PIRATES!!!!!!!
we decided to hit up the pirate museum, which is really just a few rooms of mannequins and an extremely lousy tour guide named devon. devon liked to make fun of us for not laughing at his jokes and then forced everyone to repeat the word "again" (i forget why it was relevant to whatever story he was telling) over and over while pointing out people who were not "participating."
and by that i mean, it was pretty great.
after eating some fried dough (duh), we checked out the salem graveyard, which, i'm sorry to say, pales in comparison to mt. auburn. however, there was one key category in which salem reigned superor: babies! that are alive!
especially this baby, who has the best head, ever.
although salem is packed with haunted houses and street evangelists (one woman started singing "jesus loves me" on a megaphone, which truly was a highlight), the creepiest thing we saw was this sign, posted along with fliers about shows and upcoming events:
um... whoah. HEEBIE JEEBIES ALERT!!!!!!!!
so yesh, it was a marvy halloween weekend, and now my life's dream is to plan a party at mt. auburn. in the meantime, we're working on the "apocalypse wow!" party this saturday. if you wanna come, let me know and i'll send you the deets.
oh and james d. rupe, you're totally invited. cos we can't have an apocalyptic party without the man who IS 911, a.k.a. paisley, a.k.a. crayhead.
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